User:Noggisoggi/RetroMC Inc.
Notice: This page was made for humorous purposes, and as such, the following info shouldn't be taken seriously.
The RetroMC™ corporation (ASX: MCRT) deals with its most popular product, the RetroMC™ Server™, and to aid it, the RetroMC™ Wiki™ is offered to aggregate information about gameplay, establishments and so on.
We have several products on offer, such as our bans system, the ILMBS™ and our land claim system, JVillage™; for more info, go to our Server Internals Department.
Verbatim of our press release from June 3rd of 2024
Scout,
Noggisoggi, et al.
RetroMC Inc.
https://RetroMC.org
RetroMC Inc. Offers Initial Public OfferingLegacy-Versioned Block-Game Host Ventures Into the Corporate WorldEverywhere, Earth: RetroMC, a server running on old versions of a certain, popular sandbox game, has announced its initial public offering, at a rate of $2913.00. The organisation has obtained a lot of customers since its initial founding in 2014 A.D, and the management believes that now is the best time to expand their operations and provide more goods and services.
"The reason we're going public is for the purpose of providing a good experience for our customers, clients and users via our Server™ and other services; and we share a lot of similarities with corporations, particularly when it comes to our public documents (RSPM, etc.) and the fact that our profits are classified as 'hobby income'. So we've decided to go all the way, and give our initial public offering.
I believe our synergistic staff team, who've been promoted to the Board of Directors, will seamlessly carry out our mission," saysJohnyMuffin. "Our Server will not be our sole offering as we will introduce even more products. Our team is looking into merchandising the RetroMC™ brand in the near future, and generally improve our products."
"I walked out of this meeting donning a dapper suit, which is quite symbolic of our entry into the coporate world," remarks
"Also, we did consult
"Wait, you're saying we—"
"Shhh!"
In order to test the new improvements, the team at RetroMC Inc. rolled out their changes to their documentational database at the same date as this press release as a beta, and they plan to implement such changes (in the near future) permanently if the community finds them as beneficial.
Business..
is important.
Business..
is professional.
Business is the
engine in the car
on the road
that drives us forward
to our journey.
There is no 'i' in
Business.
Inspiring indeed."
About RetroMC Inc.: RetroMC Inc. is currently owned by
startchoppin, which implement fixes to thwart exploits and such, via the use of Project Poisedon, a CB 1070 fork, patches to plugins, and in-house plugins. Its secondary product is the documentation platform for documenting info about the company and their products.
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peak
Noggisoggi media
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[Redacted!] MediaWiki formatting, this overly long gag, too many references to [Redacted!], overuse of corporate jargon, et cetera. Batteries not included. Noggisoggi: We didn't think this through, did we?
Scout: We sure as hell didn't.
Noggisoggi: Genius! 
[Sigh] My lord.. my fears did indeed manifest in reality.
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